Hit

I didn’t feel any anger, or anything else. I just felt that this guy was wrong. Just rationally. So I threw a punch. He threw one at the same time, and our fists hit each other’s. I broke 2 fingers. Him 3.

He started screaming in pain. His eyes all red. He said that it was not worth it, he was just trying to play, to pretend. He said he’ll never do that again.

But I didn’t. I think it was worth all the pain in the world. I was being alive. I was defending myself. I was standing up for what I believed. I didn’t care about anything else.

My friends, my family, my colleagues. They all said I was stupid. I want to believe them, but I cannot see. I cannot feel.

If I listen to them, then I’m not living my life. If I listen to me, then I lose them.

Maybe being oneself means being alone, and lonely.